I AM AN INTELLIGENT BEING FROM ANOTHER GALAXY WHOSE SOLE PURPOSE IN LIFE IS TO HAVE SEX WITH EVERY OTHER LIFE-FORM I COME INTO CONTACT WITH.

TO FULFILL MY TASK I HAVE THE ABILITY TO CHANGE MYSELF INTO DIFFERENT SHAPES AND FORMS. THAT IS WHY I HAVE TRANSFORMED MYSELF INTO THIS SHEET OF PAPER YOU ARE HOLDING.

AT THIS VERY MOMENT I AM HAVING A FANTASTIC SEXUAL EXPERIENCE WITH YOUR FINGERTIPS AND I KNOW YOU ARE ENJOYING THIS BECAUSE OF THE SMILE ON YOUR FACE.

AFTER YOU HAVE BEEN SEXUALLY FULFILLED PLEASE GIVE ME TO SOMEONE ELSE SO THAT I MAY CARRY ON WITH MY JOYFUL TASK AND BRING LOVE TO THE ENTIRE UNIVERSE.

ALIEN